Thursday, May 23, 2013


I've always seen modesty as culturally determined and even though I loved the idea of hijab, I could never convince myself that it was obligatory or that I was doing something wrong by going out showing my hair and parts of my arms (which is how I've dressed for the past 7 years).
Lately, I've been thinking about it some more, after being pretty satisfied with my thoughts on the subject for a while...

And my current thought is: WE CAN WEAR WHATEVER WE WANT, from nothing to layers and layers. And our clothing doesn't reflect how modest we are - our modesty is first and foremost in our hearts. And our modesty isn't about sex. Attracting sexual attention is no different or worse than attracting any other type of attention. And is attracting attention all that bad? Who knows... All I know is that I need to make a conscious effort to de-program myself in the way that I think about sexual promiscuity. I need to put it back on an equal level to any other similar not-sexually-related behaviour. It's better to be a prostitute than a dishonest businessman. But BOY do we think of these two jobs differently...

I want to put things back into perspective.

I will wear what I want from now on and others can deal with their own feelings about what I wear while I will just be who I am, the best version I can be.

2 Comentários:

Deboo said...

You are absolutely right--modesty comes from within, not without. Funny thing is that I have always preferred to wear baggy and/or covering clothes, even when I was young and before I knew Islam. Allah knows your intent, always, regardless of how you dress. Note to the males: DO NOT BLAME THE WOMAN, even if she dresses in such a way to actually attract attention, if you can't control your own urges. I have seen men looking behind a woman fully covered, and commenting on her "switch" (the way she walks.) Pakistani men I know are practically foaming at the mouth in USA because of "leg pieces" (what they call bare legs on women, and also chicken drumsticks.) American men, though, can talk to women in shorts all day and all night and not be affected unless they want to be. Y'all can find sexiness in anything, even a brick wall, and Allah knows your intention, too, so don't. Even. Try it.

Anonymous said...

I agree with Deboo in that men can find something attractive about a woman regardless of her dress. What I know about the Qur'an is that it simply says to "draw your cover over your bossom". There are Hadith that say that The Prophet said the only thing to show should be the hands and the face, and yet there are places in which women are not allowed out without covering every inch of their body except for a slit for them to see through. With so much debate, I don't know how it is possible for people to come to a consensus about what modesty truly is, Islamicly speaking. Personally, I know that all things in Islam are said to be a personal choice in that there is no compulsion in Islam. So, regardless of which side of the debate a person agrees with it would STILL be the woman's decision. Also, we are not supposed to be judging eachother. I'm pretty sure that accusing someone of being a hypocrite or unbeliever is one of the things that is punished according to the Qur'an. Let people talk. Just pray and do what Allah leads you to do.

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