Monday, December 5, 2011

Single Mom

With the amount of time my husband spends with us and the amount of help I get around the house, it feels close to being a single mom... It's necessary for him to be at the store a lot of course if we want it to succeed so this post is not "anti-husband" in any way... It's a bit of a vent maybe!

The publicity he put out really gave him a big start work-wise so he has been staying later than the 10 hours the store is open. He has also been going to Montreal (1.5h away) to get stock at least once a week. We don't have the capital necessary to stock it up like crazy so it's kind of an "as things get sold" basis for now. My husband also sleeps at the store most of the time so yeah... I stop by every day and try to bring him one or two meals per day but it's not quality time! Sometimes he doesn't see Nora for 2 whole days. Often he sees Adam quick-quick but doesn't hold him for 2 whole days.

And I SUCK at keeping on top of everything around the house! I'm pretty proud of what I have managed when I think of how much I suck, but I have a long ways to go before I'm able to keep a really clean house, feed my family really yummy meals, have laundry done on time and put away on top of taking good care of the children.

For someone used to having his mom have everything done around the house and making food that he loves every day, my husband seems pretty happy with my efforts and accomplishments. He's not asking more of me than what I do and really seems to think that I'm doing a pretty good job at least for me who he knows sucks at it! He doesn't really see me as a housewife/stay at home mom so I guess he finds I'm fitting in OK with this new lifestyle. He sure wouldn't be able to do it. He can work 15 hours a day but he can't take care of kids and a home!

Update on the baby: He's AMAZING. He's the opposite of my daughter and thank God for that! He's a really content, mellow baby. If I had my daughter (a bit of a difficult naughty child) and a high needs baby like she was, I'd be in big trouble!

5 Comentários:

Explore said...

Wow, why does he have to actually sleep at the store? I hope things get better soon, your baby is so young for you to be on your own with him all the time!

Nikki said...

I did not live with my husband (except for weekends) for the first 18 months of our son's life so I understand the single mom feeling. It's a very uncomfortable feeling, more so because you know you have a husband so this feeling seems extra unfair. I feel that way every now and then now because I tend to take my son everywhere with me and my husband rarely goes along. Even to family events like birthday parties, christmas, he'll often skip out and I just feel like an unmarried mother sometimes. :/

Also, congratulations again, on your sweet son, masha'Allah! Good to hear he's an easy going baby.

Susanne said...

Bless your heart...that is rough. Sounds like you are doing well enough, but still. He has the easy part of this deal (though yours is sweeter with your babies.) Hope he can come home to help soon.

Candice said...

Explore: In part he fears getting his stuff stolen and in part he gets annoyed sleeping in the same room as our daughter. I think another part is that it's easier over there than here!

Nikki: Yeah, you must understand exactly what I mean! It sucks when they don't come to events even... My husband comes to about half these things. My work Christmas party he really wanted to go to but that's mostly because the last 2 years I sort of excluded him and gave my 1 person RSVP without asking him. People were almost all going solo and things between us were rough but this year he's coming :) I feel a tiny bit bad for ditching him in such a rough way (not even running it by him) but this year I genuinely want him there with me.

Susanne: We both have our stuff going on. He would never be able to deal with the kids and the home, but I wouldn't be able to deal with a business. I'd be too stressed out all the time! I'm a worker not an entrepreneur... But he seems to deal with it well and I think I'm dealing well with the home responsibilities... He has been home more in the past couple days. we actually spend a couple hours together :)

Becky said...

I'm happy to hear things are going better, although I can imagine it must be really tough. Hope things continue to improve :) Sounds like you're doing a great job though! :D

Exploring Life and Islam © 2008. Template by Dicas Blogger.