Monday, April 4, 2011


Just a bunc of questions about your dowry:

Just wondering if you guys wanted to share because I'd be really interested. How much did you get/give? Did you ask or was it offered? How did you make the decision to accept or not, or how did you make the decision on a certain amount or certain material thing for your mahr? Where are you from? Is the amount you asked or were given based on cultural norms of what is to be expected or 100% on what you wanted and needed?

3 Comentários:

Zu hu ra said...

I didn't want a dowry because I knew that my husband's family (in a third world country) couldn't afford much. My host family advised me to ask for a Qur'an. I ended up asking for a Qur'an in his language (which I speak) and a wooden Qur'an stand. They ended up giving me a beautiful handcarved stand, the Qur'an and about $10 (a lot of money for them). Separate from the dowry, it is a tradition in his culture for the women to give the bride a suitcase full of clothes and fabric. I ended up supplying the money that they used to buy all of that since they couldn't afford it.

Candice said...

I find that a really sweet way to do it. :) Is it normally from the family and not the man that the dowry comes from? In my husband's culture in Egypt, men usually get married only when they can afford to do so. It causes them to get married at quite an older age than would be ideal but they definitely have a more stable life to start out than when getting married when we have nothing (me and my husband kinda did that).

Zu hu ra said...

Where he is from people are so poor that I don't think there is the idea that the man could afford the dowry on his own. Maybe if the bride's family is really wealthy and expects her to marry someone of similar status, but I think even then the groom's whole family would chip in.

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