Thursday, December 16, 2010


What can be very disappointing with Muslims is the lack of unity between us. We pride ourselves on being one Ummah, but we are just as divided as Christianity and all its sects. Someone looking in quickly will find Sunni and Shia and the rest will not be apparent, but once a person actually enters the community, he or she will find disrespect between us based on small differences in belief, or based on how well a person is deemed to practice Islam. We are not united.

I actually wrote a polite comment on someone's blog saying that I found the way she expressed herself harsh to the point of seeming to disrespect not only different points of views, but as well, the people who hold different points of views than her's. I got a comment back saying that she had no respect for people who try to shove their points of views down her throat, which is all fine, but is not something I was doing. And a second comment she wrote after visiting my blog that actually included this:
"after reading a few of your blog entries about your attending Xmas parties and such. I just want to warn you that a muslim lady blogging about going to mixed Xmas parties seems a fill in the blank."

Let's just say it's insulting. I mean, when you can't actually say the word and need to write "black", it's not the word "inappropriate" she was going for! I may be misreading, but I think she was going to say "whorish" or maybe was going for "disbelieving". Either way, she was insulting me as a person or as a Muslim.

Is this a way to treat a sister in Islam? She either was wrong in how she replied or she simply does not see me as a sister in Islam because of our differences. If that's the case, I can only say that she is exactly what is wrong with Islam today. We need to unite, not find ways to separate ourselves! I am not perfect and my beliefs are not the exact same as your's. We are all individuals but we have the same ultimate goal of submitting to and pleasing Allah!

Please sisters (and brothers), don't let our differences separate us! Let's all give a small push towards respect (even in disagreement) and it would go a long way. Because I do love you all for the sake of Allah. This includes my Christian and Jewish friends, and anyone who strives to do good and be better.

9 Comentários:

Susanne said...

I love you too, Candice! :) Nice post!

Zuhura said...

Well said!

Amber said...

Very well said Candice and very important for us all to implement. :)

Jamilah said...

I feel for you and understand how difficult it can be when people are rude.

You are right, we need to try to unite more, but on the things that are good, not on the things that are bad. So perhaps instead of someone saying that going to xmas parties is bad, they could say that your striving to understand Islam was good...

kat said...

I am a muslim and I don't see anything wrong with Xmas parties---but then I live in the east so xmas only has commercial significance. (stores getting rid of year end stocks to clear their inventories before the new year)

We all have different spiritual levels---and there are those among us who need a firm grip on their "identity" as Muslims in order to have faith. Eventually, they may not need this anymore and will be able to have faith with more confidence perhaps. Yet, it is a path they must travel on their own---and when they are ready, they will embrace growth.....for those of us who are not in this situation, maybe we can extend patience and understanding for their struggles?

Candice said...

Jamilah: What a nice perspective. It's important to see the positive aspect in everything or we will all just be put down. I know you have a very good sense of that by the way you comment on my posts when you disagree. It's always just nicely said and shown. We know we disagree sometimes, but it doesn't stop the respect from going both ways. :)

Kat: I notice the way you turn it around... That people who are very strict about things like xmas parties may simply be less confident in their faith. There might be some truth to that in some cases! It's interesting. I definitely know it's not all cases though from experience with people who are very comfortable and confident in their faith who still take the more literal, strict approach.

This sister in particular (who I quoted in my post) might be one who is not quite "there yet" spiritually and so compensates with strictness in acts and rituals. Islam is a balance between both though and hopefully she will reach that with time and learn to tolerate people better and see the bigger picture.

Technodoll said...

Amen to that!

We are before everything else, human - why let religion or lack thereof divide us?

I respect everyone's decisions on religion, to believe or not to believe, and what to believe in... just don,t push it on me and we'll all get along.

So disrespectful to get comments like that, shame on that person :-(

Candice said...

Yes, it's not cool to push views onto others. We all make our own decisions and have our own reasons and circumstances that brought us to them and we should focus on what we have in common. There's A LOT, actually, and if we focused on that, humanity would be much further along. Everything I believe in is universal. Some things I practice are cultural, but that's just another part of the beauty of life and should not cause divide.

Anonymous said...

I know how you feel. I have someone who reads my blog and acts nicely enough with comments on my blog, but posts on her blog about how much she hates certain Muslims and how fake they are, etc.. It is really prejudice and nasty. Makes me feel sad for her, actually. How can someone be filled with so much anger and judgment towards her own sisters? I mean, what is really going on inside them?

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