Thursday, December 30, 2010

Body Image

I want to make sure my daughter grows up comfortable in her own skin and simply proud of who she is, inside and out. I have managed that for myself generally but not without struggles as a kid and young teenager, where I would be extremely cautious of my weight by the fraction of a pound.

Now I have no idea how many calories I eat per day and I feel comfortable in my body. It's not as strong and fit as before, it has a bunch of stretch marks from my enormous baby, it has some cellulite, it jiggles in some places, but it's ME!

No matter if my daughter Nora becomes chubby or rail-thin or has no ass and small boobs or a giant behind, I want her to feel satisfied with what she has. I think it starts in the home. Every little thing we say as parents, especially parent of the same sex, affects our children and how they perceive themselves. WE are the most important influence.

When it comes to body image, we need to be careful about what we say about our own bodies and others. We need to project satisfaction and confidence in ourselves, not our insecurities.

What are some specific ideas any of you have to help our daughters (and sons) have positive body image?

5 Comentários:

pinkgingerale said...

I completely agree, especially with the media today. Stick-thin girls are seen as being beautiful and normal, so when young girls see that, it's so easy to perceive beauty as being just that. I think it's important to remind Nora each day how beautiful and amazing she is. Looks aren't what are going to get you through life. Drive and ambition are :)

Candice said...

Yes, it's true. The media is a huge influence. I try to keep her away from things that might be a negative influence. Just a light steer away from that and a steer towards things that promote positive body image because I think there would be consequences to being too strict when she gets to be a teenager. With the years, I will make sure she's aware of the media and its biases, and able to filter thorugh the crap we encounter day in day out.

Candice said...

Just a small story too while I'm commenting on my post. My parents were very good about making us feel good about ourselves at home, BUT just one small comment from my mom about how she felt she had small breasts and one small comment from my dad about how she was gaining weight was such a HUGE HUGE thing to me and the way I felt about my body. I was probably more susceptible somehow because I can't remember a time in my childhood when I didn't "suck in" my stomach a little. I was super thin, but I liked it to be straight down from a very young age. But anyway, it's still an important fact that these small comments I can only remember hearing once as a child influenced me so much.

Amalia said...

I have a very bad body image of myself and I hate that I'm like that. Especially after becoming a mum. I used to think I was fat and cry and cry all the time, now I look back at pictures at me from last year and think to myself I wish I were that thin again.

I already get comments about Nora from other parents at her daycare. She is quite a tall baby and everyone is telling me she is soooo big and sometimes it hurts my feelings because they say it in a negative way. Nora is not fat in the slightest, she is just tall but I feel myself stressing about it, worrying that she will grow up being teased. I want her to feel beautiful and amazing just as she is.

I'm going to have to do some serious work on my own body image and soon so that she can have a good role model.

Candice said...

Don't worry about people saying Nora is "big" - it means nothing! My Nora is gigantic too in tallness - she's always been in the +95th percentile but she's definitely not fat. She's only the 70-80th percentile in weight! But still, as a baby I've had the comment that she's big or chubby but she wasn't even. It was just her round face and tallness for her age.

Anyway, it's good that your issues are out on the table so that you can deal with them. I've seen pictures of you - you are simply gorgeous! I might not have seen your body, but you seem a very good healthy weight and that's what's important.

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