Tuesday, July 6, 2010

It's not about what I want

... it's about what is right.

As a Muslim who does not follow orthodox or traditional Islam, I'm sometimes accused of simply wanting to fetch out an interpretation that suits what I want, regardless of if it's right or wrong. It's insulting to be told that, especially when it's clear the person knows nothing about me and what I believe and why. And the worst part, has not made any effort to know. I write my blog pretty carefully, wanting to not misrepresent myself. I re-read my posts most of the time to make sure it comes off the way I want it.

I guess there will always be people who have trouble understanding and I shouldn't let that frustrate me...

But to be clear, I investigate because I don't believe in following blindly and I make efforts to push everything aside that I have been taught when trying to figure out what is right. I don't want to arrive on a conclusion based on my wants or on things I have been conditioned to believe in. And I never claim to be right. Obviously, I believe I am or I wouldn't believe it, but I know I could easily be wrong and I am always ready to change my mind.

Do my posts come off differently than what I am writing now?

14 Comentários:

munir said...

On several occasions ,you have posted things that are wrong, even when people show you prove you state that's what you believe,
That does upset muslims who have studied and practice their religion ,they would like to lead you ,help you see where you are mistaking.
Once you even stated that you were not sure the 5 prayers were fard, that's a basic pillar of Islam.

munir said...

Another example, on one of your last blogs you states that muslims who do bad things are not muslims in Allah's eyes, that a grave sin to say a muslim is not a muslim.
Muslims can do bad things,they can not be practicing, but they are still muslims.

Candice said...

I think remembering Allah and praying to him every day is fard, but I don't necessarily believe the ritual itself has to be the exact way it is or not accepted. Any prayer to Allah is accepted and it's based on intention and I strongly believe that!

That said, I think the 5 prayers and the way they are done fulfill the obligation to pray to Allah, and with that have the added benefit of unity in Islam so I accept them as part of Islam and wish to pray my 5 prayers daily.

And for your second comment, I think that a Muslim by name who does not submit to Allah or wish to (basically a person who is born of Muslim parents and could care less of the religion, and on top of that does immoral things, deeds that Allah himself attributes to disbelievers), would probably be considered a disbeliever by Allah himself. Afterall, He Himself states that these deeds are performed by disbelievers! If they consider themselves Muslims in this life, they can and I wouldn't say they can't use the label.

If you think a person gets bonus points for labeling themselves Muslims and others get negative points in life for having another label, then that's you. Because I don't. And I will not be accused of a grave sin for this. I did not accuse any person of not being Muslim and would never try to play God so don't "grave sin" me because you're doing worse than I am using a hypothetical "Muslim by name".

munir said...

you see the way you answered, where YOUR the evidence?,you are not a scholar,and you are choosing to interpret islam the way you want to.
That's what is upsetting to muslims who have studied.
Second, you did say they are not muslims,you should research a muslim is a person that believes shahada born or revert.There's good and there's bad muslims but you cannot say that a muslim is not a muslim,
Even if you think they shouldn't be seen as such,

Rukhpar Mor said...

Assalam Alaykum,

I do not read your posts regularly so I cannot comment on whether you come off differently.

But I would like to encourage you about the "not following blindly". I had a conversation with my parents the other day and they came up with something like, "you have to believe in it blindly, without thinking"-(not the exact words but close to the meaning).

I did not like that thinking at ALL. I mean if everyone thought that way, then no one would seek the truth and everyone would just be what they are. No one would become Muslim because everyone would be blindly following their own religion. Plus, no Muslim would be convinced in his/her belief because they are blindly following it.

Plus, Islam is Islam is Islam. THere is no orthodox or traditional versus modern or liberal Islam. It's just that some people tend to follow it differently because everyone is different and everyone will make mistakes. Even the four imams (abu hanifa, imam shafii) were not cut-throat with each other as some 'followers' of a particular school of thought are.

It's good that you are willing to change your mind if you find something different later. Good for you!!=)

Susanne said...

I think you come across as someone who is intelligent and kind and who wants to please God. You aren't going to take someone's word for what you are "supposed to do" or believe just because they are "born Muslim" or have been in the faith for a long time.

You seem to love God and want to please Him and that is key. Trying to please other Muslims, other people is not important. Seek to please God....seek a relationship with Him. I really like this trait in you!

And I totally agree with the comment you made about Muslim in name only. If Muslim means one who submits to God yet someone's life says otherwise, then I agree they are Muslim in name only. You can say the same thing for anyone who has a label they don't live up to.

Candice said...

Munir: It's obvious that my blog posts frustrate/upset you and I will admit that your comments frustrate me too. You don't understand what I'm saying, and I can see no efforts that you are even trying to in your comments.

My blog is a public blog and that's the way I want it. I love to get comments from all sorts of people on here and would not want to make it private. But my advice to you would be to perhaps stop following my blog. I think there is nothing positive for either one of us coming from your visiting and commenting on my blog posts. Of course, feel free to keep visiting as this is a public blog and in being public, I invite anyone to read and comment. It just seems like all comments from you are on more "controversial" topics I post about. I have, on more than a few occasions, unsubscribed to a person's blog or refrained from commenting because it was clear no one was getting anything out of it and it was all drama this seems to be one of those situations.

Rukhpar: Thanks for your comment. I agree with you. Islam is islam is islam! I sometimes write things like "traditional Islam" but what I mean in these cases is "traditional interpretations of Islam". Sometimes the distinction needs to be made because there simply are some differences in beliefs, but it doesn't change the fact that we are all trying to please Allah as well as we can and a Muslim is a Muslim, no matter which interpretation he follows. It's always interesting to know, but it's not anything important.

Susanne: What a sweet comment! :) Makes me happy to read this but you are definitely giving me too much credit... Thanks again though.

sara said...

Suzanne you are christian, and don't believe in Islam.
Islam is not only a religion it is a way of life,it dictates every aspect of your life.
Your comments to a new young muslim who needs a lot of guidance is just helping to confuse her more.
We have the Quran and Sunnah, that's where answers should come from not from friendly christians who can't comprehend what is Islam.
Islam doesn't adapt to the way of life you want,as a muslim ,you have to adapt your way of life to Islam.
That's sibmitting to Allah.

sara said...

another ,in the blog where you mentioned what Munir refers to ,you didn't say "muslims in name only",you wrote not muslims in Allah's eyes,how can you say that? you know what Allah has in mind?

Umm Omar said...

hmmm..i never noticed that about you. On the contrary, I see you as an inquisitive and responsible person who is sincerely trying to grow in the religion.

nMJ said...


I do think that you write with an open heart and an open mind, both of which are inquisitive and wanting to search and learn for the truth, alhamdulillah.

I have been following your blog via my google reader for quite some time and although yes, some of your post (more like one or two) can be a bit provoking, I don't think it should be thrown against you. In fact, if any person who wishes to lead to you a better understanding, then they should be doing it with hikmah (wait, I don't know what it is in arabic..hope you understand).

And then like Rukhpar says, Islam is Islam. I myself do not like to put myself into classified types, and often find it a bit of a bitter taste when others do (though I don't hold that against them either).

At any rate, please do go on with researching. I also advice you to find a teacher if you can, for it is much better than just reading from books or online. At the very least, you will have another person to converse/debate/talk with, in real time (as opposed to this blog you have).

Have a good week!


Blue said...

I think questioning is important to any faith. What people forget when they say "you can't interpret Islam" is that often times we are only following someone else's interpretation of Islam! And no dis to the scholars of old, but just because someone a century ago said "this is so!" doesn't make it so. Only Allah knows what the "right" way is, and those who assume otherwise are thinking pretty darn highly of themselves if you ask me. If the religion can be (and HAS been) interpreted to allow wife-beating, child marriage, and anti-semitism, then why not choose to interpret it to promote justice, equality, and love for fellow human beings? Which "interpretation" do you really think Allah would approve of?

Anonymous said...

I haven't been following your blog for a super long time, so I'm not sure what your posts were like before. ;)

"And for your second comment, I think that a Muslim by name who does not submit to Allah or wish to (basically a person who is born of Muslim parents and could care less of the religion, and on top of that does immoral things, deeds that Allah himself attributes to disbelievers), would probably be considered a disbeliever by Allah himself. "

That seems to be spot on with what the Qur'an seems to say about the topic. One can call themselves a 'Muslim' all they want, but they need to walk the walk not just talk the talk.

I agree with Rukhpar, I also encourage you not to follow blindly. ;) I've come across that mindset in my own in-law family ... even simple things blow up into a huge deal. The latest thing was about red wine vinegar my MIL had in her place ... and she was insisting it's not from wine and that some Arab store owner said it was okay. I tried to explain the process of how vinegar is made and the differing opinions on using wine vinegar but it's hopeless. Some people just don't listen and their eyes/ears are closed to whatever you say.

Candice said...

Wanted to let you guys know I read your comments! Just not much time to comment since I'm also working my job, and working on a blog post. So thanks!

Exploring Life and Islam © 2008. Template by Dicas Blogger.