Thursday, September 24, 2009

Taking a break, I think. And yeah, it's Candice this time.

I don't think I'll continue blogging for now. I don't know how long, but I don't really feel free to right now, so I will take a break. I don't know what to say, really... But I hope to be able to come back because I've had almost nothing but positive experiences through this blog. I met a bunch of great people, and I got to discover so much about myself by going about it piece by piece and reading others' views too. I'll continue to read and comment on the blogs out there.

14 Comentários:

Malek said...

ASA Candice,
I hope you will continue to blog because I believe there are other sisters out there that enjoy hearing your trials as well as your triumphs. I know as a convert a lot of what you go through I have gone through myself, and its nice to know that I'm not alone. I also think that while your husband may feel as though he is getting the short end of the stick sometimes when we get upset about something we need to vent and in some respect its easy to vent on the blog because while we do make new friendships they are not as personal as family or friends, so in essence you won't feel the backlash from them. I don't blog about somethings that I wish I could just cause I know my sister is reading. So please continue with us.

Nikki said...

I feel I just started blogging, yet I'm already thinking about walking away for a bit myself. Like you, I have other responsibilities (a family and school) and I feel that sometimes I put too much time into blogging and could be so much more productive if I directed my time/energy elsewhere.

I deleted my facebook partly because it caused a number of fights between my husband and I, and partly because I knew I spent too much time on it when I should be focusing on school and my son. Less than a year later, though, I replaced my facebook obsession with blogger.

As a Muslim convert in the midwest, though, I feel it's my only connection with Muslim sisters. Also, since my family doesn't yet know, it's sooo nice to get things out there and not just have to keep all my trials, tribulations, and frustrations to myself. (I can tell hubby, but as a born Muslim, he really doesn't get it)

I read what your husband wrote. I, as well, meant for my blog to revolve around Islam. I quickly shifted to personal stories and information, though, and fear I have already shared too much. I've posted pictures of myself and a picture of the back of my son.

I guess I'm sharing all of this in order to say, don't give up the blog completely. Blogging, for me at least, has been a wonderful way to feel connected to the Muslim community. It's easy to get wrapped up in it though, and turn to it even when there's a more productive way of dealing with our (negative) emotions. I posted one negative post about my husband and quickly deleted it because I knew I'd regret it once we got over the argument. Maybe stick to you're Islamic journey and positive personal events and save the negative for a private blog that is just for you.

I have loved reading your blog for these past 3 months and would miss it were you to disappear completely.

Stacy aka Fahiima said...

I think its good to take a break sometimes. You need some time to get reconnected with Nora and Ahmed to just play and relax. I hope that your marriage and family ties are strengthened during your break :)

SarahC said...

This whole episode has got me thinking about blogging, spouses, and privacy. It's tricky isn't it? I hope it all works out for the best for you. I do (perhaps selfishly) hope you come to an agreement where you feel you can continue to blog! Take care Candice.

Melissa said...

I think it's good to take a break from time to time. I hope you'll be back at some time. Take care!

ellen557 said...

I have had a few troubles with M over blogging too... they passed though after I made the private one. A break is always good too, even though you are sorely missed!

Life's Balance Beam said...

i have an idea. just move your blog to another spot. change all passwords and make it look like this one was closed down!! :D and we will ALL still follow you im SURE. but take your time sweetie dont force it, you do need candice time so take a break evaluate some things and feel better inshaallah!

caraboska said...

Ellen, Way back when you made that private blog and asked people to leave a message in the comment section of the post about that if they wanted to be invited, I remember being unable to do so because for some reason the Name/URL option had disappeared again. Any chance of fixing that?

Candice said...

Caraboska, I'm not sure Ellen will see you message. I haven't written on this blog in over a month so I'm sure I don't have many visitors!

Anonymous said...

Hi, Candice!

I hope you and your family are fine!
I found your blog only a few days ago and couldn't stop reading it since - easier said than done with 2 small children, school work, house chores etc.! And I was left for wanting more... ;)

I'm really sorry that you are at the moment in a situation where having a break from the blog seems necessary. (I do understand your husband's feelings because you have been quite frank about him in your writings, but at the same time I'm totally relating to your need to vent once in a while - I'm too married to an African, born-muslim, though a bit lazy to practice, and it's really not that easy...

Anyhow, I'm really wishing for you to be able to continue to write about Islamic stuff later! Your standpoints to Islam, religion in general, God itself are so similar to mine - like 90 % of what you wrote until last spring could have been almost straight from my pen... That's why I would like to hear more about your ways to cope with some possibly problematic aspects of Islam as a new revert from similar background to mine (good family though not religious, easy enough life (some reverts have a background of heavy partying, boosing etc.), rational way to assess things etc.).

I myself am not a muslim, though am married to one and try to bring our children up as decent muslims - meaning I'm trying to be at least some kind of a role model: I'm praying, studying Quran, covering, fasting etc. A lot of people think I am officially a muslim and the rest wonder why I'm not since I'm already doing many things which muslims are supposed to do. I do try to submit to God to the best of my ability (to be a "muslim"), but there are certain issues in the current (?) interpretation of Islam which I don't quite accept and those are the ones I would have been eager to hear your thoughts about!

But family comes first!
I wish you all the best, high iman and health for your cute daughter!
Hope to hear from you when the time's right!

Säde

Candice said...

Thank you so much for your comment, Sade. I recently had some major talks with my husband, and the blog came up. I've been wanting to continue writing on here, but I found myself with little to say about Islam. That was another reason for just not writing.

I've definitely been thinking about backbiting lately. It has been a subject on a lot of blogs, and even on mine, when I think about it. I realize I said too much in the past (posts that are still up) and so I apologized for that. He also apologized for hijacking my blog, because it *is* MY blog afterall. It took me some time to get over the flight incident. Not being with my daughter for 6 weeks when it was agreed that it would be 3 weeks. It was not easy.

I have started writing a new post that I hope to post up soon... And I hope to be back blogging regularly soon. So keep visiting!

Last question though: Why did you stop identifying as much with me in spring? My conversion was at the end of July... So I am curious about what might have changed in me in spring! Thanks again.

Anonymous said...

Hi! Welcome back!

Yeah, to your question: maybe that much didn't change since spring but during the summer you had more posts about your personal life, and also I wanted to be on the safe side with that comment, because there is a chance that coming closer to your conversion you might have changed some of the opinions or views you had earlier, so that's also why I mentioned the spring specifically... :) That's all, no more than that!
(It's always a bit risky to say that you agree with other person's opinions in general because nobody can agree totally about everything and I'm always trying to be accurate in my statements - which is annoying some people (meaning mainly my husband and my sister, not anyone here ;) .)

Säde

Candice said...

Anon, I guess you're right, I was less on the topics then and started getting more comfortable with my readers.

I get you about wanting to be accurate in what you say. I am the same way, although I try to allow myself to just be general and say what I want to say sometimes, because it gets exhausting for me and annoying for others to cover every aspect of something!

Candice said...

Anon, I guess you're right, I was less on the topics then and started getting more comfortable with my readers.

I get you about wanting to be accurate in what you say. I am the same way, although I try to allow myself to just be general and say what I want to say sometimes, because it gets exhausting for me and annoying for others to cover every aspect of something!

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